On Babies and Breweries
It's a balance
Go on Google Maps and look up a popular nearby brewery. One that has a nice outdoor space. Most reviews will be positive. People will compliment the beer, the friendly staff, and the patio. They will extol the return of the craft brewery, once a staple of American life before Prohibition, which has now returned for a second act. There will also, without fail, be a complaint about the brewery allowing children.
This has always been an issue, but in recent years, it has become the biggest controversy in the brewery scene. Like everything else in America, both sides have turned things up to 11. There are a lot of people out there who wish for breweries, and in fact most third places, to be children-free spaces, the preserve of adults alone. Then there are parents who treat breweries, and all other businesses, as personal playgrounds and let their kids roam free and wreak havoc. Now that breweries have become a staple third place in American life, it’s worth working through the problem, because a lot of people on both sides of the issue are clutching their pearls and responding with knee-jerk impulse.
First, every brewery has the right to only serve customers who are 21 years of age or older. In fact, many bars do just that. Anyone under 21 years of age is not allowed on the premises. This shields the bar from liability issues from serving underage patrons. By being 21+ bars can keep out children entirely. The fact that most breweries, especially those with outdoor spaces, are not 21+ signifies that the business itself is welcoming to children. In fact, many breweries have high-chairs and changing tables in the bathrooms, which explicitly signals they want families to patronize the business. Customers who want a child-free space while drinking should go to a child-free bar. There are plenty, either by explicit rule or through local custom. Or go to the family-friendly brewery, but go at night after the children have gone to bed. Those going to a brewery that allows children, especially during the day, should expect children to be there.
Second, those who are against children in breweries have concocted a false history. A common complaint in online reviews is some variant of, “parents should leave their kids at home like they used to. Breweries are meant for adults.” This is totally false. First, to almost anyone older than 30, your parents did not regularly go to brewpubs when you were a kid and leave you at home. They didn’t exist! The craft brewery craze began in the 1990s, but even then, most craft breweries were in industrial parks and indoor only. The purpose-built, outdoor-space microbrewery didn’t become a common thing until the 2010s.
This type of brewery has always been child-friendly. There was never a time when breweries with outdoor spaces were for adults alone. Ever. Those claiming otherwise are making up a false reality. Older Zoomers and young Millennials who are now having children of their own should salute Gen Xers for establishing, from the get-go, that outdoor breweries are fun for the whole family. Those arguing that breweries should be adults-only are the ones trying to change the status quo, not the opposite.
Third, the constant gripes about children at breweries are a bit odd. There is a lot of bad behavior at breweries, but most of it is not from misbehaving children. It’s from misbehaving adults. Having a child run into you because they are running through a brewery and not looking where they are going is bad behavior, and something one can legitimately complain about. But so too is having an adult walk into you because they aren’t looking where they are going. Or having an adult spill beer on you because they are drunk. All these things happen, but people only go to the keyboard to complain when it’s a child. I’ve yet to read a negative review about a brewery that complains another adult customer was having a conversation on speaker phone at max volume, and that made the brewery unpleasant. Those who are more annoyed by unruly children than by unruly adults need to reexamine their priorities.
That said, breweries that welcome children are not playgrounds. One of the top breweries in the New Haven area, New England Brewing Co., widely known as NEBCO, recently opened a second location with a large outdoor space. After a few months they put up this sign all around the premises:
This is a great sign. Some parents let their kids roam entire breweries and treat them like McDonald’s PlayPlaces. This is not appropriate. While taking the “arm’s reach” literally is probably a bit much, having children nearby and making sure they are well-behaved is a must for parents. Climbing all over the jungle gym at a local park is great. Climbing on top of tables at a brewery and jumping off is unacceptable. Parents need to make clear to their children what type of behavior is expected. This, of course, is what parenting is all about. Many a time I have seen parents at one table talking and drinking, with kids at the next table playing games. Perfect.
Kids will of course misbehave, but as long as the parents quickly rein in bad behavior, it needs to be tolerated. This is how typical children become well-adjusted adults. Sometimes kids will act out, but as long as a parent is on hand to correct them, the system is working. For those who don’t want to deal with even the smallest of inconveniences regarding children, go to the local dimly lit hole-in-the-wall and drink with all the alcoholic barflies that have been at the same stool for decades. No kids will be there and you can have your adult-only space.
More broadly, the rights and toleration of children need to be about balance and awareness of the type of establishment. Adults and children should be welcome in public parks. However, adults need to hold themselves to a higher standard when in spaces designed for children. It is not appropriate to swear like a sailor next to the swing set. On the other hand, even if a sports bar allows children, parents need to be aware that they are entering a primarily adult space. When watching a big game on a Friday night, adults are going to misbehave and act like adults. Those not comfortable with their kids seeing those behaviors should watch the game at home.
Breweries are a great middle ground. During the day they are a great space for parents to take their children and meet up with other parents. It’s also a great place for adults to meet up and share a beer. America has a severe lack of businesses with outdoor spaces where people are free to circulate. Breweries are one of the few, and a great place for all people to mingle. Dividing all venues into places where either children reign supreme or are banned entirely is not good for society. Parents should take their children to breweries and make sure they are behaving. Adults should expect children to be well-behaved but extend some latitude. It’s not that complicated.